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USDP Lifestyle Terminology

Knowledge is Power, Knowing where to find the answer is just as powerful

Anal/Ass Play: You should be well versed in and prepared for the possibility of things happening to your butt hole

BDSM: an overlapping abbreviation of bondage and discipline (BD), dominance and submission (DS), and sadism and masochism (SM)

Bi-curious: a heterosexual who is interested in a sexual experience with someone of the same gender

Bi-sexual: a person who is sexually attracted to all genders

Bukkake: repeated ejaculation on an individual

Consent: Asking for and giving permission is of utmost importance at sex parties

Cuckold: A man with a Hot Wife, a cuckold gets satisfaction from watching his wife with others.  Cuckold dynamics usually enjoy a submissive nature, that may include humiliation.

Compersion: This term describes the feeling of happiness and joy knowing that someone else is happy. In the lifestyle  world, it’s the complete opposite of jealousy; it’s being more than okay with the fact that your partner is having sexual intercourse with someone else.

Exhibitionist: Someone who gets off on knowing that they’re being watched during sex

Foreplay: Just because you’re at a sex party where everyone is likely down to fuck, it doesn’t mean you should skip the foreplay! The lead up to fucking, where guys get hard, women get wet and the fun starts.  

Dead bedroom: a term used to describe a depleted sex life

Discretion: In the lifestyle community and sex parties, you should always assume that people don’t want to be known publicly for being at lifestyle events. Sometimes aliases will be used to hide identities.  Be respectful of others need for discretion.  If you see someone you know at an event, club, lifestyle site or party , just know they are there for the same reason as you. 

Dom: an abbreviated term for the word (dominator), someone who is the dominant person in a sexual context and/or relationship

Double penetration (“DP”): when someone of the female sex has two penises in any bodily orifice at the same time (e.g. anus, vagina, mouth)

Fetish: a sexual desire whereby someone is sexually gratified in an atypical way to a certain object, article of clothing, body part, etc. (e.g. panty fetish)

FMF: a threesome involving one male and two females.  The Position of the lettering is important and implies who interacts physically 

Full swap: when a partner/couple is willing to engage in full sexual intercourse with another person or couple

Kink: an unconventional sexual fantasy, fetish, or concept; derived from the idea of a “kink” in one’s sexual behaviour

Gangbang: when multiple partners (usually 3 or more) engage in sexual intercourse consenually with a single partner

Group sex: when more than two people engage in sexual intercourse (e.g. multiple couples having sex in same room)

Hot Wife: A woman who's husband doesn’t mind just mind letting her play with others but encourages it. 

Hygiene: Make sure you are clean from head to toe before you arrive at a sex party.

Meet & Greet: are a kind of free for all where you can meet other like-minded people who you may not necessarily see at the sex parties. They are casual networking after-work events usually held at bars, resturants or other vanilla locations. A great way to get to know others in the lifestyle in your area.  

MFM: a threesome involve two males and one female.  The Position of the lettering is important and implies who interacts physically 

Newbies: Newbies are usually first-timers who may or may not be seasoned swingers. Sometimes they’re just new to the group.

Pansexual: someone whose sexual attraction is not restricted by gender, biological sex, or gender choice

Play: In the lifestyle, play means sex. If someone says they want to play with you it’s sex-related.

Polyamory: the concept of having more than one romantic and/or sexual relationship at the same time

Sub: an abbreviated word for the term “submissor”; the submissive person in a sexual context and/or relationship

Soft swap: when a partner/couple is willing to engage in foreplay (e.g. oral sex) and sexual interactions with another person or couple except for full intercourse

The Lifestyle (LS): the modern day term for “swinging”

Unicorn: The mystical unicorn is a single female who is open to playing with a couple with no strings attached. Most refernces to a unicorn also imply the single female is also Bi.  

Vanilla: term used for regular people who engage in monogamy and do not swing

X List: Anyone that breaks the rules of the sex parties will not be invited back ever again. The rules are pretty simple, straightforward forward and basic common sense. Don’t get drunk, don’t touch without consent, and don’t reveal the location or identity of people at the party. If you fail to adhere to these basic rules then you’ll end up on the X List.

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